These kids can't be hurried. They can't handle it and it affects their school work. Wake your daughter up 15 minutes earlier on school mornings. Let her pick out the clothes she wants to wear the night before. The easier you make it for her to get going in the AM, the easier it will be on you. CD And do it with love. She's not trying to drive you crazy.

When my son was 5, I had him tested for add/adhd.  The doctor gave the teacher and I both questionnaires to fill out.  I returned them to him and he spotted the problem immediately.  My doctor suggested working on relationships with friends before worrying about academics.  My son is now 9 and he has lots of friends who understand that he may not always be on the same wave-length, but he cares deeply about them and they care about him.  He's having trouble learning to read because he doesn't always stay focused, but with his medicine, the teachers tell me he is wonderfully behaved and a very hard worker.  The key for me was to be willing to accept that he needed help and to have him tested, find out what I was dealing with and learn as much about it as I could.  In this way, I learned to accept some things he does and just ignore them.  We focus on the positive things he does.  I hope this helps.  My other two children 11 & 13 both show signs of add also, but they are not on any medication.  They use a planner to keep track of assignments and the teachers are helping out by making sure they use it.  Feel free to discuss your concerns with your child's teachers.  They are usually more than willing to help in any way they can.  After all, it will make their job easier in the long run.  Good Luck!

I have an 11 year old daughter, who very much fits the description of your daughter. I have found the public school to be of little help as there are so many biases and perspectives. My advise is to find a good child psychologist and work closely with the LD teacher (or consult with someone good, often at Children's Hospital or call the State regulatory department for guidance.

Find an advocate, look on the web, Wright's Law, cry, get up and keep going, no one else cares the way you do. We all wish we had another type of child to deal with, but this is what we have, so move on and stand by your daughter no matter what, the more you react to her, the more she reacts to you, step back and try and cool down. Good Luck

We do manage somehow. Keep a paper trail with the school. Mine is 13, oboy!!

Dear ADD Parent;

I have a son who is nearly 12, and is ADHD. He is also difficult in the mornings. We have found that we need to allow an hour for getting off to the bus -- he just doesn't transition well from waking up through all of the morning activities to getting on the bus. We also found that watching a morning TV show helps (NOT CARTOONS)-- we watch Good Morning America as the program shows the time. This way he is exposed to the morning news which helps with current events at school, and he isn't as likely to become beligerant with me or get too distracted and begin playing. And the program isn't engaging enough to keep him riveted. Having a morning routine is critical. The times he has to be at school early for band practice sets us up for a disaster -- he is so hostile. I should wake him earlier those days, but I always forget and then we are rushed and he makes everything so difficult.

For school, our savings grace has been medication. I don't know if your daughter is on medication, but if she isn't, you may want to consider this option. The medication allows him to focus as well as I believe he is much more tolerant with friends. We have been through Ritalin, Adderall, and he is now on Concerta. We just "upped" the dosage, and now school is much better than it had been. He actually asks for the higher dosage on weekends, especially when he knows he is having a friend over or doing some other activity.

My son has a short fuse and is sensitive, so he too has had difficulty with friends. ADD kids tend to wear their "emotions on their sleeves", and my child tends to overact - especially in cases where he has been hurt. Just this week he was injured on the playground, and EVERYONE knew as he screamed so loudly. As a boy, this only further impacts friendships, as now the other boys are beginning to tough things out more and don't want to be seen crying. Although I know he is hurt when he isn't invited to the birthday parties, etc., he also doesn't really seek out to invite people over. I encourage my children to have their friends come over, but my son is very content playing by himself and doesn't always want or need friends. My husband is probably correct in his assessment that just getting through the school day is "tough enough" and coming home and getting through homework is still another challenge -- having a friend over is probably just one more stress he doesn't need. When friends are invited over, or if a few local kids "pop in", it is important to be somewhat "present" to observe and possibly intervene. You may need to assess your daughter's willingness to compromise and to think of others feelings. ADD kids do not seem to "read" other people's signals well, and have to be taught everything that other kids just seem to pick up by osmosis! I've also found that my son is often the target of other kids for being picked on. Recently, I discovered that one "friend" who always popped in after school to hang out here, and this child had numerous meals here and would go with us to the pool, etc., would then belittle my son to other kids during recess. We all felt "used" by this child, and I after hearing my son complain for months, another child e-mailed my son about the recess incidents. Now I knew it wasn't my son overacting, and I told this boy's mother that he were upset to hear that her son could befriend my son outside of school, but would pick on him in school. Recess has been better for my son now, and this other child isn't coming over. But it is always emotionally heartbreaking for both you and your child.

Good luck and keep reading. The more educated you are, the more you will be able to help your child and educate others.

I'm sure that most of my depressive episodes over the years are a direct result of living with ADD without knowing it. My family used to joke about me and say that I should get a "brain scan" or "shock treatments." I was called "mental case" by my own siblings. That was my nickname for years, plus a few others. These types of remarks only add to the insecurity and low-self esteem of an ADD child.

It took me a few years in therapy with anti-depressive drug treatments, but I can now say I have pretty much overcome a lot of the negativity of my life. I still have the rather low self-esteem, but I am taking my first college course in 26 years and am doing very well in class. I am artistic and have taken many Bob Ross painting classes where the teachers have told me I have a natural talent, and that my first painting was much better than the instructors' first painting. I have thought about teaching the class myself some day, but my low self-esteem makes me shy away from such an idea. Please have your daughter evaluated by a professional, preferably someone who specializes in ADD. With the proper treatment, she can overcome many of the hardships that come with this disorder. Good luck, and bless your heart for caring enough about your daughter to ask for help.

Dear Parent,

I am a journalist who recently wrote an article about children with sleep disorders. I interviewed a number of nationally prominent experts in the field of pediatric sleep disorders and learned that it is more common than people (even doctors) realize. Adults who have sleep disorders tend to be lethargic. Kids with sleep disorders exhibit signs of ADD, ADHD and many personality disorders. They have trouble paying attention and show a lot of negative behavior, from just plain irritability to impaired impulse control, even violent aggression.

Kids may also suffer from restless leg syndrome, which will also deprive them of sleep. Before you put your daughter on drugs, or have her labeled with a learning disability, answer these following questions: Does she rip out her blankets every night? Does she toss and turn? Is her bed a mess in the morning? Does she sleep walk or talk in her sleep? Kick or jerk in her sleep?

If you answer yes to many of them, then ask your doctor to refer her to a sleep clinic for a sleep study. It takes just one night to determine if there is a sleep disorder. If there is, it can be treated and her whole life will change.

Let me know if you are interested in reading the article that I wrote and I can tell you how to find it in on the Internet, in the archives of the newspaper that I write for.